*to Hanlon's razor: Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.

Tuesday, 11 August 2015

As there's no Legacy Wagon anymore

Seriously, fuck North Americans and their bloated dumbassed lifestyles.  I was born here, but have lived in Montréal*, Tokyo, don't eat like them, drive like them, commute like them, vote like them, drink like them, dress as poorly as them, fuck like them!

I have been trying to find a new car.  There are hatchbacks, there are buses, and there are SUVs never taken to gravel, so much as 'off-road'.  Almost nobody's selling mid-size wagons; I want a wagon damnit**, and am unwilling to spend for an Audi or Volvo, thank you very much.  Nor will I buy a North American shit-box, nor Korean yet, nor Toyota for its lies.  Making the list short.  I do not even want to buy a car, and wouldn't have to in Tokyo, but North America fucking sucks, and sucks even harder without a car.

I am left with these options, too many of them 'CUVs', just two letters away from what a Brit would yell.  Why no CUV/SUV?  Well, I know how to fucking drive, unlike the locals, and know something about the difference between a truck meant for hauling crap, with a high centre of balance, and a vehicle that's some pleasure to drive, and safer.

Volkswagon Golf Sportwagon Trendline, $29K
- just a bit small, no AWD, and as expensive as the rest, so... no.

Nissan Rogue S AWD, $29K

Toyota RAV4 AWD LE, $31K 

Honda CRV LX, $32K

Mitsubishi Outlander ES AWC, $33K

Subaru Outback 2.5i, $35.5
- this is the closest even if overbuilt to the cancelled Legacy Wagon, but $5K over the others?
- what's the point of the Forester?  Little cheaper, narrower and shorter,  but a higher centre of balance.

I am unhappy with all of these.  WTF?

*Technically in North America, but not entirely so...
**With AWD, because we are a Nordic country, and nobody else can fecking drive.  Not to mention a CUV/SUV without AWD/4WD is like a codpiece hiding an orchiectomy.

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