*to Hanlon's razor: Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.

Friday, 14 June 2013

I, 'hikikomiri'? Wierd anyway.

I think it's the horrible interior light that makes them go off.

Last night, with my family off to the in-law's for the weekend, my pizza delivery crossed paths with my parcel from here.  Today, I went to the nearest large station's up-market department stores for real beer, cheese, and peanut butter, and kept muttering to myself,
Why aren't all of these thousand fucking twats aimlessly cluttering the aisles out drinking on a Friday, passive-aggressively out-waiting their co-'workers', or at home?  And when is the demographic crash going to happen, because there are still clearly too fucking many people on these islands?!
So tonight I am again at home, and am going to do even more online ordering in future.  Too much annoyance even to go get ramen: bread, cheese and beer it is!

Overnight, I had the oddest fucking dream, which will sound much more sexy than it was experienced by me.  I need to tell it to someone, but can't tell the wife, can't put it on Facebook, and you will soon see I cannot tell it at work.  You are the audience.

I woke up, in the dream, in the same t-shirt and boxers I'd fallen asleep in, on the same futon in the same washitsu with three futons, but my subconscious had remembered that my J-wife and hybrids were at the in-laws.  It had not remembered that I do not have my office-mate naked in that room, with her legs affectionately draped over me at a 90 degree angle, very fucking often.  Très casual, not pre-, post- or whatever the prefix is for during coitus.  She's not a bad piece of, better than a decade younger, engaged to a Gaijin who can likely take me down, and a white girl herself.  White is not my favoured hue, as one might guess, though I've nothing against attractive in any complexion.

I've certainly not seen her naked, or in so little as a swimsuit!  Nor have I even been with a white woman for more than a decade (hey, been married for half of that, after all), but it's amazing what the mind stores, because it created an authentic and idiosyncratic bunch of images that mirrored no woman I have in truth been intimate with... or seen in porn.  The freckles on her back, and the way that a white woman's breasts look more attached-to than part-of her chest compared to an Asian's (it's a description, not a judgment) kind of surprised the hell out of me for their clarity when I woke.

As dreams do, this one disappointed the hell out of me.  An old and bearded Eastern European looking guy came in and took over massaging the nape of her freckled neck from me, without so much as taking off his cap and jacket.  Then a male coworker entered the room and he and I shared a laugh that Lindsay Lohan's daughter was going to enter our school.  The next moment there the blond girl was, with her grandmother in bottle-blond.  The dream ended without any nasty or even a good look at my co-worker's primary sexual characteristics, wtf?  Still, felt odd talking to her today...

You know, it's a real shame that humans cannot make polyamory work.  Too bad about emotions, STDs, pregnancies and property-laws, and the near certainty of her disinclination, because if it weren't for that trivia, I think I'd now have a go!


  1. Doubly weird, I had a dream about one of my co-workers last night too. It is strange talking to them the next. I always wonder if they had the same dream -- no logic in that but who knows? It's not like either of you are going to ask.

    1. I just realized I cannot remember having had any such dream with a woman I've ever in fact had sex with. I guess that's why it's called a 'DREAM'!

  2. Oh I forgot the important part of my dream -- my ex-bf turned up to spoil things but he was really upset because George Micheal was dead! He's Greek (the ex).

  3. "Too bad about emotions, STDs, pregnancies and property-laws"

    **Let us Pray..**


    LOL...that had me laughing but it shouldn't cuz it's too true

  4. When I have co-workers or friends appear in sexually driven dreams, I feel like they know. Like they know I had a naughty dream about them and if I talk to them I know they will call me on it. Of course that would never happen but I still feel my face go hot and avoid eye contact.

    1. Does it happen that often...? Ha.

    2. Fortunately it does not as it did a decade ago. If it did, I would end up never leaving the house for fear my face would melt off.